Can anger be a good thing?

Last week I posted the question to Facebook, Can anger be a good thing?

I was unsure how others would react.

Would they think I was angry?

Would they think I was unhappy?

Would they be concerned about me?

I then realized I shouldn’t be concerned about what people think or how they perceive me and posted the question.

The amount of reactions and comments I got surprised me, making me think anger is something many others deal with or at least have strong thoughts towards.

“The unexamined life is not worth living.”

– Socrates

I’ve had moments of anger in life making me feel like I have no control or power. That’s the worst feeling, having no control. Especially when you do everything right and bad things continue to happen. Then again, what’s considered bad is subjective and to some knocking over the salt shaker can screw up their day and to others they believe everything happens for a reason – I’m starting to lean towards the latter.

GOING TO MY PAST- I remember when I had my second brain injury and the doctor told my parents and I there’s nothing he could do to save me and to basically take me home to die. Now I admit, when the second brain injury started happening the words, are you shitting me, ran through my mind several times.

It’s easy to ask why? Or Why did this happen to me?

However in all honesty when those thoughts ran through my mind I often thought, if it didn’t happen to me it might happen to someone else and I’d rather have it be me than one of my family members.

I feel like I was built to handle it, as crazy as it sounds.  

During the second brain injury I was in such a state of disbelief and pain I’m not sure I could even recognize anger because I was so vulnerable but, it was in there. I have to believe the entire situation scared the living day lights out of my parents and probably made them angry, especially when that doctor told me to my face, a 16 year old boy, I was going to die.

Later, during this journey there were moments where I was ready to die and was okay with it. I just wanted the discomfort and pain to go away.

Laying in a hospital bed with tubes running through your body is no way to live.

After the doctor said there was nothing he could do, my parents, rather than stew in anger used it to get me a second, third and fourth opinion which was a trip to Akron, Ohio, a laser surgery in Buffalo and brain surgery in Ann Arbor.

So, to answer my question, can anger be a good thing?

Yes, hell yes! If you channel it correctly and use it to accomplish a goal!

Take Risks!

The reality you wish you weren’t familiar with-

Do you ever wish life was easy and you didn’t have to worry about any responsibilities? Like you could wake up on your own terms?

It’s funny because I often feel like I’m just going through the motions and that’s what I’m supposed to do. Like, find a means of living that pays you well, whether it makes you happy or not and just do it.

When we’re younger everyone tells you that you can be whatever you want to be. You can accomplish whatever you want to succeed. And to a point they’re right but what if as children we asked those people telling us this the following:

Have you followed your dreams?

Are you doing what you want for a living?

Have you taken risks?

The problem is at some point it seems like we do things because it’s what everyone else is doing. We’re just following the crowd.

My question is, why do we do that? Because it’s easy? Because it’s safe? Because we need money? Because we’re afraid of failure?

I almost think failure is cool because you tried something. You went up against the odds. You didn’t follow the crowd. You were fearless!

At the end of the day we’re all in control of who and what we are? It’s our choice to make things happen

In closing- I want you to think about what you’re doing and think if it’s what you actually love. If it’s not consider taking a risk and maybe walk away from the crowd of sheep!

Try something different. And of course, you need to examine your finances but do it and make that change! At least try!

Become the Mr. Miyagi of your anxiety

Wake up with your intentions-

 Stress fills our bodies not only during moments of adversity but also during moments of thought. Sometimes stress and worry is the first thing we allow ourselves to think the moment we wake up out of bed.

It’s sad it goes this way, but we often allow stress and anxiety to take control making us feel as if there’s no escape asking ourselves when is it going to end? I was feeling like this a few days ago and I don’t know where it came from or why I was feeling different?All signs were pointing to it’s a great day. I mean it was sunny, beautiful and warm outside but for some reason in my mind it was cloudy, concerned and tired.

Furthermore, for any brain injury survivor who has a disability due to their injury you’ll likely agree that your disability increases during moments of stress making it more difficult to function.

For myself, it made the day more challenging and I wasn’t happy these feelings of worry were hanging over me like a dark cloud. However, I was determined to make sure each day following for the rest of my life will be different.

How do I accomplish something so grandiose? Continue reading…….

When I woke up the following day, I felt completely different. Why did I feel different and free of stress?

I woke up with the intention of feeling great!

Rather than giving stress or worry control, I replaced it with positive thoughts and how I wanted to feel or what I wanted to accomplish for the day. It sounds so simple but when you intentionally channel your thoughts for how you want to feel it’ll make a positive change to your attitude and life.

For my fellow brain injury survivors out there, and this also includes people who deal with concussions, migraines, anxiety and other mental health disorders, replace your negative thoughts with positivity. Tell yourself no longer will I allow negative thoughts consume me. Vision how you want to feel, what you want to happen and pursue your goals to succeed. When you have a positive goal in front of you it gives you something to shoot for and helps you forget the negativity!

I wish you all heath and happiness!