Take Risks!

The reality you wish you weren’t familiar with-

Do you ever wish life was easy and you didn’t have to worry about any responsibilities? Like you could wake up on your own terms?

It’s funny because I often feel like I’m just going through the motions and that’s what I’m supposed to do. Like, find a means of living that pays you well, whether it makes you happy or not and just do it.

When we’re younger everyone tells you that you can be whatever you want to be. You can accomplish whatever you want to succeed. And to a point they’re right but what if as children we asked those people telling us this the following:

Have you followed your dreams?

Are you doing what you want for a living?

Have you taken risks?

The problem is at some point it seems like we do things because it’s what everyone else is doing. We’re just following the crowd.

My question is, why do we do that? Because it’s easy? Because it’s safe? Because we need money? Because we’re afraid of failure?

I almost think failure is cool because you tried something. You went up against the odds. You didn’t follow the crowd. You were fearless!

At the end of the day we’re all in control of who and what we are? It’s our choice to make things happen

In closing- I want you to think about what you’re doing and think if it’s what you actually love. If it’s not consider taking a risk and maybe walk away from the crowd of sheep!

Try something different. And of course, you need to examine your finances but do it and make that change! At least try!

I get Dizzy when the Weather Changes

THERE ARE MOMENTS I BECOME LIGHT HEADED- It happens most during the transition between summer to fall. This time of year has always been a challenge for me. It’s nothing I can’t manage but every time when summer is ending and we slip into fall I get the occasionally dizzy spell. During college I thought it was just stress of school and during work I always assumed it was stress of work. It took me awhile to realize that I have dizziness due to my brain injury. I think it’s a combination of that and the fact that when my brain injury happened it was during the fall.

Don’t get me wrong I’m not whining or complaining I just wanted to know if other brain jury survivors get like this when the weather changes? Or if anyone else gets like this when the weather is in flux?

It sometimes makes me wonder if I should live somewhere with a stable climate like California but earthquakes? No thank you. Just kidding.

When I have these dizzy spells I remind myself that it’s just the weather and no, I’m not getting sick again. This is easy for me to do now but years ago it wasn’t so easy. I would stew in the fear that I was getting sick again. I get it and the message I’m trying to convey in this blog is to be self-aware of your body and how it acts. Self-awareness is what gives you control and that’s a powerful thing!

If you feel different during the changing of the weather tell me. I’d like to know I’m not the only one.

Also, tell me what you do to help yourself? I put emphasis on rest and drinking water!

Let’s Stop the Gossip!

I’m sitting on my orange couch trying to think of something to write for Brain Talk however my creativity is at a halt. The truth is I’m tired and so is my mind. Oh well, I might as well give it a try. Like Wayne Gretzky said, you miss every shot you don’t take!

I’ve been fascinated with people lately and the story behind who they are and how they became that way. Everyone is so different and there are truly no two of the same people, duh!

What I specifically find interesting is why people talk crap about another person’s flaws behind their back. The reason why this bothers me is two fold.

  1. First and foremost, can’t we talk about something better than discussing someone else’s mishaps and flaws? I can probably think of twenty different things so just stop. It doesn’t feel good and I hate the thought of people talking shit about me behind my back so why would I want to do it to someone else.
  2. The truest thing in the world is people cannot choose the person they are born to be. Some of us get lucky and are born the gifted athlete making millions who enjoys donating money and volunteering in their free-time. Others draw the short end of the stick and are born with no ambition and are setup to go down the path of drug addiction. Or some are born with a twisted pedophile’s mind.

Now, I’m not condoning anyone but the body and brain we’re born into is the person who we become and we don’t really have a choice. I mean, people can make decisions but at the end of the day, you are who you are. I bet you a million dollars a drug addict or pedophile would give it all up to have the talent of Tom Brady, J.J Watt or Tiger Woods.

Now, Tiger Woods is a prime example of being born with athletic talent and addiction issues. You can get both ends of the bargain, I guess.

So, in closing, he next time you’re with a group and you’re talking negatively about someone else try to stop the group and change the conversation to something positive. Remember people can’t chose who they are.

How about don’t talk about anybody. Do anything other then gossip. I guarantee the conversation will be more fun and will make you feel better. It has to be good for your brain. There’s no way it isn’t!

I hope you enjoyed this article. What are your thoughts on gossip? Do you do it? Did you realize how stupid it is? Do you regret it? Do you think people have full control of who they are?

Do you find the humor in life?

Let me tell you something. Life almost never goes as you plan. I wish life worked out like I plan but for some reason it doesn’t, and that’s okay. In my mind I believe the setbacks and getting knocked off my feet is humbling and makes me stronger.

At this moment I kind of want sleep but I’m writing this blog and that makes me happy. The post 4th of July slumber has kicked in and I’m wore out from bathing in the sun and overeating delicious meats and treats that make my stomach say “oh child, that’s good, gimme more!”

But let me milk you one last time!

Also, my head hurts because I’m tired or it’s sensitive due to having a brain injury once upon a day but I’ve been miking that excuse like Besty the cow for years, sorry Betsy. You’re a good ole girl and I love you but you gotta go!

The truth is I make a lot of jokes about my brain injury and the disability that came with it. Even though I’m very mobile and strong enough to feel like I don’t have a disability I like to find humor in the flaws I have.

Regardless of what happens in my life I’m always going to find the humor and that’s something no one can ever take from me!

So let me ask you, do you find the humor in life?

Dating with a Disability & Keeping the Spirit of a Kid!

Recently – I had a fellow brain injury survivor ask me if I’ve ever had someone not date me because of my disability?

My first thought was shoot, I don’t know. Sure, it’s crossed my mind but I always thought my charisma and swagger out-shined my disability.

I say that tongue-in-cheek but I wouldn’t be surprised if a girl wasn’t into me because of my disability, and to be honest I wouldn’t hold it against them. Everyone is looking for something particular and if a disability turns their head the other way who cares?

Now, I don’t think this is wrong, I just believe we all need to find what works for us.

I do think there’s someone out there for everyone and if you meet them great, if you don’t just enjoy the ride that is life. I’m saying this as a 33 year old who is “adulting” but also still trying to keep a little bit of the adventure and happiness like I had when I was a kid.

There’s a saying that goes something like……when you’re a kid you’re encouraged to play and told you can do anything you put your mind to, but at some-point we become an adult and forget that.

As an adult, I’ve lost the free spirit to play and adventure and I’d like to change that. The truth is, tomorrow I’ll go to work and will take my work very seriously. And that’s okay, I’m proud to be a hard and passionate worker but I also would like to try to make work more fun, as if I were a kid.

My dad said one time, work is supposed to be fun and he’s right. Whenever I’ve gone to his work he’s always being funny and his employees are always laughing.

Summing this up- I do think there have been girl(s) who didn’t want to date me because of my disability despite my charm and charisma, and that’s okay. It’s their life and all I can do is worry about mine!

If you made it this far I hope you enjoyed this article! Have you lost the spirit of being a kid?

And, if you have a disability, do you think someone hasn’t dated you because of it?

Overcoming Obstacles!

Stay on your timeline-

I wish my goals and dreams were accomplished faster. Whether it’s my career, relationships or improving my disability.

Following my original brain injury the journey to becoming independent was long and hard but I eventually got there. And while I know every brain injury survivor doesn’t have the luxury of pure independence everyone has attainable goals they want to achieve.

I’m not sure if I’m the only person that feels this way but it seems like I’ve often gone 1 step forward and 2 steps back many times. Now, while this isn’t always the case, it’s put me in a position to always be looking forward and not dwell on the past. It’s easy to sulk, whether you’re down about the brain injury that happened to you and how it flipped your life upside down but you have to remind yourself you still have a choice.

You have a choice on how you react to the things that happen to you in life. It’s your opportunity to climb the hill and overcome an obstacle or to do nothing and stay where you are. What gives me motivation is knowing I have control how I react to these challenges and if I can overcome the majority of them it’ll make life more fulfilling!

It’s all about perspective. How will you react to your next obstacle?

When to tell others about your Brain Injury

I’ve often asked myself when is the right time to tell new people I meet about my brain injury and the traumatic experience from it?

Common situations: First dates, job interviews, new friends, coworkers

The truth is there’s no right or wrong time to tell others about your brain injury and or disability. I do think however, it’s important to make sure it connects into the conversation. You don’t want to bring it up out of the blue.

Let me give you a good example when to bring it up:

I remember during a job interview when the man across the table from me asked that I tell him a moment or experience in my life that I was humbled.

I responded, to tell you the short version of the story, when I was 14 I had a brain AVM and was hemorrhaging. The doctors didn’t think I’d make it through the night and I ended up being in a coma for 6 months. I had to learn how to walk and talk all over again, and a year later it happened again due to residual issues. I ended up surviving a 10 hour brain surgery that was life or death.

Now, that was an appropriate time to share my story, but for common situations I don’t always tell people. If it comes up during conversation, great. If it doesn’t, no big deal.

I’ve noticed that when I share my story with someone who I’m not necessarily connecting with, it brings us closer together. I don ‘t know if it’s because they didn’t understand who I am or that I shared an intimate story with them? Nonetheless, you’ll know from your gut instinct when the best time is to tell others about your brain injury and disability.