Helping A Brain Injury Survivor With Insecurities About Virginity & Life

A fellow brain injury survivor messaged me saying:

I’m having a very rough day/night.

I have a humongous crush on one of my physical therapists and an even bigger one on my personal trainer. Today, my main PT (Physical therapist) had to have yet another discussion with me on my acting “boy crazy” and how the valentines plans I thought I had with the PT I have the big crush on are inappropriate. And now all I keep thinking of is my 10 year school reunion this June and how I’ll likely be the only only virgin.

I can’t seem to catch a break.

She added, and while I’ve been talking to you, a friend posted.

I replied:

I’m sorry to hear you had a rough day. I think it’s important to ask yourself why you care so much about finding a boy and losing your virginity? 


Sometimes we build unimportant things up in our mind. The truth is there are probably better things/more important things to put your energy towards.

 

Plus, no one at your 10 year reunion would be able to know you’re a virgin. And I promise no one is wondering that. Only you! 


Also, i like that tweet you shared and I’ve wondered before what my life would have been like if I never had a brain injury. It’s okay to have those thoughts. You don’t know who the alternate you would’ve become. Shoot, what if non brain injury me became a crackhead? You just don’t know so don’t worry about things you have no control over. 


Hope this helps.

In Closing

I think it’s interesting how we all manifest our life at times to be this big, beautiful thing with infinite success and happiness. The truth is, that doesn’t exist and life often kicks us in the ass at times and it’s how we react to those moments of adversity that will result in how we feel about ourselves. It’s important to know that we are all in control of how we react during tough times and moments of adversity. Your perspective controls how you feel!

Are you going to overcome it?

Dating with a Disability & Keeping the Spirit of a Kid!

Recently – I had a fellow brain injury survivor ask me if I’ve ever had someone not date me because of my disability?

My first thought was shoot, I don’t know. Sure, it’s crossed my mind but I always thought my charisma and swagger out-shined my disability.

I say that tongue-in-cheek but I wouldn’t be surprised if a girl wasn’t into me because of my disability, and to be honest I wouldn’t hold it against them. Everyone is looking for something particular and if a disability turns their head the other way who cares?

Now, I don’t think this is wrong, I just believe we all need to find what works for us.

I do think there’s someone out there for everyone and if you meet them great, if you don’t just enjoy the ride that is life. I’m saying this as a 33 year old who is “adulting” but also still trying to keep a little bit of the adventure and happiness like I had when I was a kid.

There’s a saying that goes something like……when you’re a kid you’re encouraged to play and told you can do anything you put your mind to, but at some-point we become an adult and forget that.

As an adult, I’ve lost the free spirit to play and adventure and I’d like to change that. The truth is, tomorrow I’ll go to work and will take my work very seriously. And that’s okay, I’m proud to be a hard and passionate worker but I also would like to try to make work more fun, as if I were a kid.

My dad said one time, work is supposed to be fun and he’s right. Whenever I’ve gone to his work he’s always being funny and his employees are always laughing.

Summing this up- I do think there have been girl(s) who didn’t want to date me because of my disability despite my charm and charisma, and that’s okay. It’s their life and all I can do is worry about mine!

If you made it this far I hope you enjoyed this article! Have you lost the spirit of being a kid?

And, if you have a disability, do you think someone hasn’t dated you because of it?